How's your body image?

Your Body Image is 16% Unhealthy, 84% Healthy

You have a great body image. You know that no one looks perfect, and you're happy the way you are. Also, you don't judge other people on their looks... and it helps them feel better about their own bodies!

How's Your Body Image?

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Day 38

Weight: 140
Calories eaten yesterday: 1793
Calories burned: 2083
Deficit: 290 calories
Carbs: 49g (good)
Fat: 81g (yippee)
Calories burned in exercise: 272

Day 38 of my new start. I thought for sure my weight would be up today because my sodium intake was sky high yesterday, but my weight held. Coolness! Slowly it's coming down. Cutting the calories back just a bit has really helped.

I want the taste of all those delicious carby binge foods, but I also know that I would set myself back for a few weeks if I were to do so. Thus far that has kept me in check. Atkins works, but you have to work the program!

Why does the bakery section have to be right by the produce section at the grocery store? I am tempted by those huge chocolate muffins every week.

I'm trying something new with my cooking, since staying up late every Thursday and trying to cook, do laundry, and pack lunches all at once is a bit frazzling. Today I bought a buttload of ground turkey, and plan to stay up late tonight and hopefully get enough burgers cooked for two weeks, which will mean no cooking next week. I think I have tomorrow free, also, to finish anything I don't get done tonight.

My paycheck was disappointing this week. I put my church giving right behind rent and groceries. Well, after rent and groceries, there was nothing left over. And forget paying bills. My bank account is back in the negative and I just got paid today! I can't wait for my vacation check to get here. Paying my Internet service up has really messed with my finances, and I really want to get my blood tests done ASAP. It's been over a year since my last one. *sigh* I know it'll all work out - it always does - but I just don't need the stress. Maybe I should cash in more vacation time and leave just enough for my vacation in August.

I've been evangelized by a raw foods vegan on Flickr. I swear, I respected Tina when she went that way, but I don't respect people who think their way is the only way and you must be a moron if you don't understand that. *sigh*

It's the same mentality as those on the low-carb board who think you're an idiot if you do Weight Watchers. I found myself in the strange position of defending WW because my Mom has done great on it - she lost 70 pounds and has kept the weight off.

I started getting ready for Conference by buying a jar of organic peanut butter today to supplement my breakfasts there. I'll get a loaf of low-carb bread a little closer to the date I leave. I like meat and eggs, but it gets really tiring after a real short time as the only breakfast choices, and at least one day the only thing they serve that I can eat is eggs. So peanut butter on low-carb bread it is. It'll be a nice treat as bread does make me gain weight, but I loosen up a bit on vacation. :)

I'm going to wow everyone at Conference by wearing those size 8 shorts that were skin tight last year. This year they fit!

Well, this is my Friday so wish me luck as I head into my weekend, that I stick to my diet and not gain! Weekends are the hardest. At work I have stuff to distract me; no such luck at home.

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Another pic from Rob's BBQ

Click for full size.
Julie and I
June 24, 2006
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Day 37

Hope you all had a great 4th of July!

Weight: 140.2
Calories eaten yesterday: 1703
Calories burned: 1940
Deficit: 237 calories
Carbs: 50g (okay)
Fat: 80g (yippee)
Calories burned in exercise: 112

Down one pound today so not too shabby. I thought I would be up. I'll get there yet!

My only "cheat" for July 4th was a sugar-free chocolate bar (no sugar alcohols). I was really craving chocolate and decided to give in since it was a holiday, even though I was stuck at work. I subtracted the pork rinds to keep the calories down.

Hit the gym this morning. Didn't rack up many steps though because I did 20 minutes on the recumbent bike and that doesn't make the pedometer click. So I won't make 10,000 steps today. Still, FitDay says I burned 272 calories, so that's good. Felt good working out today - lots of energy, even though my carbs yesterday were normal.

I'm slowly getting stronger. Today I did arm curls with the 20 pound dumbbells and I could do five reps the first set instead of four. The last two sets were only four each. And on the weight assisted chin up I've gone from six reps to about eight, so doing good there, too.

I've started working in more leg exercises - walking squats up the ramp by the emergency door, leg presses, etc. I've also added back in the Smith machine to strengthen my arms and pecs, while using the compound row for my arms, back, and shoulders.

Woot! Go me!

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Independence Day Red, White, and Blues

Happy July 4th everyone!

Weight: 141.2
Calories eaten yesterday: 1646
Calories burned: 1932
Deficit: 286 calories
Carbs: 50g (okay)
Fat: 71g (a bit low, even for the number of calories)
Calories burned in exercise: 89

Up 0.2 today. Why can't I lose? If this keeps up much longer I'll binge out of sheer frustration. At least I'm back to double digits with the cheat free days.

Talked to Helen today and described my extremely sleepy feelings after binging on carbs last Thanksgiving. She said it sounded like high blood sugar (she has diabetes and so knows this sort of thing), and with the history in my family, she said I should ask my doctor about glucose tolerance test to be sure that I'm not hypoglycemic or something.

I'm not due to see my doctor for a long time, but it's something to file away as "Maybe something to do in the future." It couldn't hurt, right? At most, including everything, I might lose about three weeks worth of dieting work. I know I have to carb up before the test, eating lots of carbs for a few days before to switch my body back to a primarily carb burning mode. It'll wreak havoc with my weight for quite a while, but it'll just be water. I'll just have to put the scale away for several weeks.

No exercise today due to my meeting with Helen, but I did wrack up 11 minutes walking up the hill and another 27 minutes walking the last leg to work. FitDay says 112 calories. At least that's something.


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Week 5 Weigh-In

Week 0: 144
Week 1: 147.2 (+3.2 lbs.)
Week 2: 143.2 (-4 lbs.)
Week 3: 141 (-2.2 lbs.)
Week 4: n/a
Week 5: 141 (0 lbs.)

Total loss: 3 lbs.

*sigh* Didn't lose anything. 141 for the third straight day and second straight weigh-in. The only thing that's changed in the last couple weeks is drinking copious amounts of diet soda. I know in the Carbohydrate Addict's Diet, the Heller's talk about sweet things causing an insulin release even if they are sugar free things. I don't know if it's true. It could be. It definitely should be studied. Insulin is the fat storage hormone. Anyway, I'll cut back on the diet sodas to one a day except on weekends and see if that helps.

Three pounds in five weeks isn't that bad. It's just the not losing for the past two weeks that has me bummed.

Did pretty well yesterday.
Calories eaten: 1840
Calories burned: 2089
Deficit: 249
Carbs: 53g (okay)
Fat: 85g (yippee)
Calories burned in exercise: 272

Had to run into San Francisco today, so no gym. I'll only make it to the gym twice this week. I did walk the last leg to work, though. FitDay says 89 calories. Not as good as the 272 of yesterday, but at least it's something.

Eating three fried eggs for breakfast every morning has really helped with the hunger before lunch. I know protein and fat satiate while carbs make you hungry, so I have to think it's the protein and fat in the eggs (and the very low carbs) that keep my tummy happy for so long.

Walked over 10,000 steps yesterday, counting my gym time.


On the work front Jon is on vacation, so I tracked down Thad and had him make out the paperwork to turn 60 hours of vacation into cash. That should be enough to get me out of the hole created by paying up my Internet service for a year, and have enough left over for the blood tests I need, plus maybe pay a couple bills. :) With that in the works, I can see the light at the end of the tunnel.

Nothing special planned for tomorrow. I have a meeting before work, then come in for my regular shift. No special food planned either. Just my usual. Just another day, though I expect when I come home tomorrow night the cats might be a bit more hyper than usual from all the loud noises they'll be subjected to.

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Chick graphic courtesy 3 Fat Chicks.

Got protein?

I'm learning some really interesting stuff from the Protein Power book. I just started the book yesterday and I'm already on page 97. It's that good! I have to read with a highlighter pen handy. You have to get this book! Available on Amazon for as little as a penny (plus shipping) - about $3.50. That's what I paid for my copy.

Here's what the Eades' say about the importance of protein when dieting to lose weight:

Your lean body mass (LBM) is the metabolically active part of you, consuming most of the energy...Ideally, you want to keep all of it.

On typical low-calorie, high-carbohydrate, low-fat diets, protein intake is often marginal, and as a result as much as 50 percent of weight loss can be muscle weight. Each pound of active muscle mass lost reduces your rate of metabolism...

The proper care of a lean body mass requires that every day you provide it with enough high-quality complete protein to carry out all its vital functions. (pgs. 92-93).

A pound of muscle takes 50 calories a day to maintain, and a pound of fat only 2 calories (source). Basically, the more muscle we have, the more we can eat and still lose weight, so losing muscle is a very bad thing. I know I was losing an alarming amount of muscle before I added a protein shake after my workout. That was a huge help.

Losing too fast isn't good for the lean body mass. A person can only lose 2 pounds of fat a week. Anything above that is water and/or lean mass. Woman generally lose at the rate of 0.5-1 pound per week, a safe pace and more likely to spare lean muscle.

A moderately active person needs 0.7 grams of protein per pound of lean body mass (LBM). He gives a formula for calculating your LBM. That's the minimum. I'll be calculting mine when I get home and look up my LBM in my fitness folder where I keep that info. It is perfectly safe however, to eat as much as 1 gram of protein per total body weight. For me, this means I can have up to 140g a day - which I usually meet and often exceed.

Why are low-fat diets so often deficient in protein? Because protein foods often contain fat as well - meat, dairy, eggs, cheese - and in cutting the fat, they slash the protein along with it. Both are replaced with carbohydrates, which bring their own slew of problems.

Protein Power is a high-protein, moderate-fat, low-carb approach to weight loss - not too different than what I'm doing now.

I've been reading Dr. Michael Eades' blog nearly every day. He has so much good information there.

I want to build muscle so I start my day with protein; today was three fried eggs. On days I work out I take an Atkins shake with me to get protein into me as soon as possible after my workout. There's a very small window to take in protein after a workout before your body starts cannibalizing its own muscle. Since I can't have a protein snack because I am at the gym, I opt for the shake.

Work it, baby! And eat your protein.

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Fifth weekend

Weight: 141 (same as yesterday)
Calories eaten yesterday: 1988
Calories burned: 2012
Deficit: 24
Carbs: 63g (too high)
Fat: 93g (yippee)
Calories burned in exercise: 183

Total calorie deficit for last week: 1866

I'm really happy with an 1866 deficit last week, but it's depressing when I think that a pound is 3500 calories.

Tomorrow is my official weigh-in. I hope it's a good one. I'll definitely be good today, but I am so hungry.

Made it to the gym. 30 minutes of weights, 30 of cardio on the elliptical, and 20 of walking. FitDay says 272 calories. I was craving chocolate so I took a Chocolate Royale shake with me instead of strawberry. Yum!

I walked over 10,000 steps yesterday - rare for a Saturday - by going for a 1 hour walk around the neighborhood. Whew! That tired me out, but I needed to burn the calories.


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Day 33

Weight: 141
Calories eaten yesterday: 1752
Calories burned: 1832
Deficit: 80
Carbs: 60g (the high end of acceptable)
Fat: 70g (too low)

Back up to 141 today. I knew that would happen and I can live with it. I'm still doing pretty good. Today was a very long day, beginning at about 6 a.m., so calories are higher - more than I burned. I knew I'd be at church longer than usual, so I brought a small lunch with me rather than just a protein shake. We had lunch at Leona's, with cake for Becky's birthday. I bummed one bite of cake off someone and that took away my desire for any more. On low-carb a "taste" is enough!

Next week should be more normal; the week after will be an all day affair with one of our bi-annual meetings so I will have to pack a big lunch.

Started reading Protein Power by Drs. Michael R. Eades and Mary Dan Eades today. It's really cool because it goes into the role of not just insulin and carbohydrates in making us fat, but also the role of glucagon in helping make us slim. Dr. Atkins never really talked about glucagon in his book. No one low-carb author has all the facts, so I think I will learn more in this book.

I don't think insulin problems made me fat. I think Zoloft stimulated my appetite and cravings for carbs, I ate more than I burned, and the insulin nicely crammed all that carbohydrate into my fat cells. It's possible that Zoloft actually screwed up my insulin, but I thinks it's more likely it just caused me to eat too much.

However, with a history of diabetes on both sides of my family, I almost certainly would have developed diabetes in the future. I had three strikes against me: diabetes on both sides of the family, obesity, and too many carbohydrates in my diet. Now I just have one strike (the family history), and diabetes cannot develop when carbohydrate intake is low. So as long as I stay on this diet, I will dodge that bullet. I have Dr. A to thank for that. :)

Tomorrow I should be able to make it to the gym, then Monday is my bi-monthly mail run into the City, Tuesday I see Helen, Wednesday I can go to the gym, and Thursday is groceries. And that's my week. So only two gym sessions.

I have excess tummy skin from my weight loss, and it's ugly. I got a good look at it when I stepped into the shower yesterday. So ugly. *sigh* Everyone says it will tighten up, but I'm skeptical. But I guess it's better that it's rolls of skin rather than rolls of fat, which is what I first thought it was.

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Sabbaths and Sundays, Common Proof Texts, #7

Today we tackle what is probably the most often used "proof" verse of them all, so it's a bit longer and includes links to other sites with further info.

Claims: Colossians 2:13-15 says that the law has been nailed to the cross, and Colossians 2:16-17 says the Sabbath has been done away with.
And you, being dead in your sins and the uncircumcision of your flesh, hath he quickened together with him, having forgiven you all trespasses; Blotting out the handwriting of ordinances that was against us, which was contrary to us, and took it out of the way, nailing it to his cross; And having spoiled principalities and powers, he made a shew of them openly, triumphing over them in it. (vv. 13-15).

There are several different ways to translate,"handwriting of ordinances." The one above is KJV. The NIV translates this as "the written code, with its regulations," and the NASB says, "the certificate of debt." So what does the Greek say? The Greek word is cheirographon. This is the only place in the entire Bible that this word is used, so we must look outside the Bible to find its usage and meaning.

Scholar Samuele Bacchiocchi says, "It's usage in apocalyptic literature indicates the cheirographon is the 'record-book on sins' or a 'certificate of sin-indebtedness' but not the moral or ceremonial law. This view is also supported by the clause 'and this he has removed out of the middle' (2:14). 'The middle' was the position occupied at the center of the court of assembly by the accusing witness. In (this) context...the accusing witness in 'the record book of sins' which God in Christ has erased and moved out of the court" (Bacchiocchi, The Sabbath in the New Testament, pg. 111)

So we see the the NASB is probably the closer translation here. Far from the law being nailed to the cross, it is the record of our sins that has been nailed to the cross, thereby destroying any legal reason for our condemnation! We are truly set free in Christ! "What God destroyed on the Cross was not the legal ground (law) for our entanglement into sin, but the written record of our sins (Bacchiocchi, ibid.).

Let no man therefore judge you in meat, or in drink, or in respect of an holyday, or of the new moon, or of the sabbath days: Which are a shadow of things to come; but the body is of Christ. (vv. 16-17).

Colossians 2:16 deals with how the Sabbath is celebrated, not if it is to be celebrated. Paul is not doing away with the Sabbath here - he is telling us not to judge each other in how it is kept.

The key here is the phrase "in respect of." The "shadow" referred to in verse 17 has to be something in respect to these other days. What could the shadow be? The most reasonable explanation is the sacrifices that the Sabbath, new moon, and festivals all shared. Those sacrifices were a shadow of Jesus' perfect sacrifice. So the shadow referred to in verse 17 is the sacrifices, not the Sabbath itself.

To quote Ken Burdick (a Seventh Day Baptist pastor), "The idea of Col. 2:16 is: don't let the false teachers talk you into keeping the Jewish ceremonies of the Old Covenant. Don't let them judge you for giving up the dietary laws and the Temple ceremonies (with the burnt offerings Moses commanded for the Sabbath--and for the New Moons and festivals). Reason: 'These are a shadow of the things that were to come; the reality, however, is found in Christ' (Col. 2:17). The 4th Commandment was never a shadow of Christ's coming. The burnt offerings, however, were a foreshadowing of the sacrifice of Christ's body on the cross."

See also the law was nailed to the cross for more information.

See the Seattle church's Sabbath FAQ for a more complete and lucid answer to this question.

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Scripture taken from the NEW AMERICAN STANDARD BIBLE, Copyright 1960,1962,1963,1968,1971,1972,1973,1975,1977,1995 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission.

Scripture taken from the HOLY BIBLE, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION. Copyright 1973, 1978, 1984 International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved.

The "NIV" and "New International Version" trademarks are registered in the United States Patent and Trademark Office by International Bible Society. Use of either trademark requires the permission of International Bible Society.

I hit the 130s!

I hit a new low today! Woohoo! I stepped on the scale this morning and I was 139! I am finally in the 130s! Wow. I have never seen the 130s before! My previous low weight was 140.2. I'm sure it's just a fluke and I'll be up tomorrow, but I'll take it. A month ago I started at 144, so getting serious about cutting calories has certainly worked! Plus I haven't had a serious cheat since the Bay To Breakers race. Not cheating works!

Weight: 139
Calories eaten yesterday: 1647
Calories burned: 2088
Deficit: 441 calories
Carbs: 32g (yippee)
Fat: 72g (a bit low, even for the number of calories)
Calories burned in exercise: 272

Walked over 10,000 steps yesterday, counting my gym time.


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Gratuitous cat picture

Xena in front of my collection of Left Behind books.


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Day 31

Weight: 140.8
Calories eaten yesterday: 1730
Calories burned: 1929
Deficit: 199
Carbs: 45g (good)
Fat: 83g (yippee)
Calories burned in exercise: 83

Made it to the gym today. Did 30 minutes of weights and I am convinced I'm getting stronger, whatever the personal trainer says. I think my last body fat test was a fluke - one week after a major binge (for the Bay To Breaker race) I was still carrying extra water weight and bloated. I think the results would have been different had the test been done a week or two later.

Anyway, did 30 minutes of weights today - leg and arm. I did abs but forgot the lower back exercise. Then 30 minutes of cardio on the elliptical with the arms, then 20 minutes of walking on the treadmill.

I'm happy with my 140.8 weight today. Of course I wish it were lower but that's still 3 pounds in 31 days which is not just good for me - it's excellent! I just have to keep the calories down and I can lose. Wish me luck getting these last three pounds off!

Turns out Oscar will be at church on Sabbath, so I'll be able to get a ride there. I still have to get up around 6:30 and leave the house a little before 8:30, though. And I'm not sure how late I'll be getting home so I'm planning on packing a lunch.

I finished reading The Mormon Murders today. Pretty good book. I'd say 4 out of 5 stars because the sheer number of characters left me confused a great deal. Still a good book though, and worth the read, especially if you enjoy true crime stories. :)

I'm thinking I'll give Protein Power a shot next, but I may just end up flipping through it and reading what catches my fancy. Depends on how good it is.

Of course, there's always the various health and fitness magazines I pick up.

I removed a link from my watch today. The watch was getting ridiculously loose. I have one of those link bracelets except that it has a watch along with all the links. I bought it in Alaska last year on the cruise. I tried to use one less link when I bought it, but had to add a link because it left a major imprint on my wrist because it was so tight. Now it just leaves a minor imprint, which is better than having it slip around, especially during my workouts. Only two links are blank. The rest are used up with cat-related stuff, some links from places I've visited, and a couple patriotic ones. And one that says "Princess" and has a little crown. :)

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Why sugar isn't so sweet after all...

From Jimmy's blog:

Despite all the evidence pointing to how unhealthy it is for people to consume, sugar is still given a virtual free pass by many of the so-called health experts in this country because they don't believe it is a contributing factor to obesity and health problems such as diabetes, heart disease and worse. It doesn't help matters that they cite studies showing sugar is good for mental health, healthy living in general, and other such idiotic nonsense. That's why the average American consumes a whopping 146 pounds of sugar every year! Ay-yi-yi!

Nevertheless, people who have researched the definite detrimental impact sugar is having on the body know that it is much worse for you to consume than fat ever will be and has certain addictive properties which lead to obesity and its related diseases.

The list was compiled by anti-sugar author and spokeswoman Dr. Nancy Appleton.

After narrowing down the choices, here are my top 10 from Dr. Appleton's list of the 146 reasons why sugar is ruining your health:

1. Sugar can produce a significant rise in triglycerides.
2. Sugar can weaken eyesight.
3. Sugar can produce an acidic digestive tract.
4. Sugar can cause premature aging.
5. Sugar contributes to obesity
6. Sugar can cause heart disease.
7. Sugar is enemy #1 of the bowel movement.
8. Sugar can cause depression.
9. Sugar feeds cancer.
10. Sugar is an addictive substance.

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Progress

Weight: 141.4
Calories eaten yesterday: 1766
Calories burned: 2092
Deficit: 326 calories
Carbs: 44g (good)
Fat: 85g (yippee - nice and high!)
Calories burned in exercise: 281

I can live with 141.4. That's only a pound above last week's new low, and still an overall loss of 2 1/2 pounds from 144 when I started this latest phase of my diet. Two and a half pounds in a month. Not bad at all. I can live with that. :)

My jeans are feeling looser again. I think I've lost the weight I gained on Saturday. My size 8 Old Navy "just below waist" jeans were downright comfortable to put on. They are definitely looser than a few months ago. Since yesterday I've felt generally better and back in control. Gotta love low-carb. :)

Monday weigh-ins screw me up because if I mess up and eat too much it's usually on Friday and/or Saturday. I have got to get out of the house on Friday and do something to keep me from eating!

Walked over 10,000 steps yesterday, counting my gym time.


Update: Almost forgot to say that I had to go grocery shopping today, so no gym time. I did the 1.5 mile walk to work from BART. FitDay says 83 calories. I notice the number of "calories burned" goes down as I lose weight. But it's great to lose!

My legs are still a bit sore from that leg workout two days ago, so today's walk was a little painful, but no big deal. My arms are also sore from yesterday's workout. Arm soreness is rare, but very good because it tells me I'm working them hard enough for results.

Tomorrow it's back to the gym for me and more arm work, probably combined with some leg work, too.

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Day 29

Calories eaten yesterday: 1719
Calories burned: 2106
Carbs: 42g (yippee!)
Fat: 88g (yippee!)
Deficit: 387 calories

I've decided to track my deficit/overage on calories. That should give me a better idea of what I'm eating vs. what I'm burning off (or not). The calories eaten/burned graph on FitDay doesn't give exact numbers. I just know I should be losing because the calories burned side of the graph is always a little higher, even counting those "off" days when I just plug in 3000 calories as an estimate. By the time it's averaged out, the 3000 calorie days end up not mattering. I just can't eat that way every day, lol!

My butt hurts today! After the leg workout I did yesterday, my butt is killing me. I still made it to the gym and did arms and core, followed by 30 minutes on the crossramp elliptical (hard when your butt hurts), and 20 walking on the treadmill.

I figured out why my arm/core workout on Sunday was so hard. It wasn't the extra water weight. It was the 12 minute, 1 mile run (5 mph) that I did first. That sort of thing tires me out and makes my weight workout harder. That's why I try to do weights first and cardio second - so I can give the weights my all.

My shoulders have been hurting and I am wondering about having the opposite problem than before - overworking my shoulders to the detriment of my pecs. So I decided to add back in my bench press on the Smith machine, while continuing with the compound row (because it's so fun!).

Walked over 10,000 steps yesterday, counting my gym time.




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Picture courtesy Exercise and Leisure.

Conference photos - my change through time

Here's Conference pictures over the last few years. I think it helps show my weight loss. :)


Conference 2003
Weight: about 200


Conference 2004
Weight: about 185


Conference 2005
Weight: about 150
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Day 28

Here I am starting over with my count as of yesterday. I got as far as 33 days before messing up. I doubt I'll make it that far this time since my cheat wasn't a true binge and I didn't get to eat massive amounts of horrible food.

Friday was on plan. I just ate way too many veggies and made myself sick. Yes, you can eat too many veggies! Maybe the reason I started bloating up that day was too many veggies. 70g of carbs didn't help either. That's way too high.

This was supposed to be my new weigh-in day, but due to gaining massive amounts over the weekend I'm canceling the week 4 weigh-in. Hopefully I can get some of this weight off by next week. I promise - I will post a weight next Monday, even though I know it will still be up. I see new lows very rarely, bounce up, and then don't see those numbers again for months at a time. :-p

Calories eaten yesterday: 1659
Calories burned: 2069
Carbs: 42g (good)
Fat: 85g (yippee - nice and high!)
Deficit: 410 calories

Walked over 10,000 steps yesterday, counting my gym time.


I forgot to include this yesterday, so here's my FitDay workout numbers for two days:
Sunday I burned 301 in my workout.
Today I burned 298 in my workout. Since I concentrated on arms yesterday, I concentrated on legs today, but did some arm stuff, too. Tomorrow will be another arm day. :)

My size 8 ladies skirt feels a bit looser, so I think some of the water weight is coming off. I certainly drank enough water yesterday! I'm afraid to go near my jeans. I'm so fat.

Anita and Oscar are out of town this Saturday, so that means getting up about 6 a.m. if I want to make it to church. It's going to be over a 2 hour ride there (bus/train/bus/bus), and I won't be getting home until the evening. This means taking more food than usual if I want to stay low-carb. I'm currently planning what I could take. I'm thinking a meal bar might be in order, along with my usual shake, and maybe some raw veggies. Veggies do nothing to fill me up, but they make me think I'm eating something at least. Also some peanuts where I know the number of calories to keep me out of the peanuts at church where I have no way of knowing how much I'm eating.

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Latest pic

The pics other people took will not be ready for quite a while. I'll definitely be putting some of them on Flickr when they do arrive. For now, here's a cropped picture of me. I was standing next to my sister when it was taken. I'm about 145 pounds.


June 24, 2006
Technorati tagged: atkins, diet, atkins diet, low carb, weight loss, obesity, obese, overweight, fat, picture, photo

Fourth weekend

Calories eaten Friday: 1813
Calories burned: 1812
Carbs: 70g (way too high)
Fat: 62g (way too low)

April went to dinner without me (and didn't even call me!) so I was able to count calories and carbs Friday.

After losing 2.2 pounds last week I started bouncing back up rapidly. I couldn't bring myself to weigh myself Saturday morning because I felt so bloated, and this morning...forget about it. I've gained 5 pounds easily and I didn't even cheat that bad. I'm not going near the scale for a while. Looks like my whoosh fairy left and went on vacation.

Breakfast Saturday I had two slices of low carb bread and I made two open-faced PB&J sandwiches - with natural, unsweetened peanut butter and sugar free jelly. Also a sugar free "toaster tart." One serving Dannon yogurt sweetened with Splenda. Finally, I had one slice of swiss cheese.

I did okay at church. I had peanuts for snack and a little bit of cheese crackers, but way less crackers than I wanted to eat. For lunch I had Jane's salad (no fruit in it this time) with Ranch dressing, and the baked eggplant and cheese I brought, with sour cream for topping.

At the BBQ yesterday I was mostly good with the food. I had several oysters, but since they have carbs I ate less than I wanted. I had some chips dipped in guacamole - not nearly as many as I wanted, and I went heavy on the guacamole (the guacamole is diet friendly). I had some arugula salad with hearts of palm on it, with vinegar and oil for dressing. I had two different kinds of sausages. I don't know if they had carbs or not. They may have. I had lots of beef - just beef and rock salt - totally diet friendly. I had one bite of orzo pasta since I don't recall having it before and wanted to see what it tasted like. I had some eggplant leftovers.

For drinks I stuck to wine, rum and diet Pepsi, and straight diet Pepsi. Everyone else had mojitos with regular Sprite. I had just a sip to taste it. For dessert I ate two bite-sized cream puffs with chocolate drizzle. I wanted a lot more, but stopped at two. I had a sugar free chocolate bar when I got home.

This morning I have a hangover - I drank easily twice what I know my limit is. I took two Ibufrofin and went on with my day as usual. After the gym I was both tired and hungover so I got a sugar free energy drink. I need the caffeine and with the hangover the B vitamins and herbs certainly can't hurt.

I knew I'd have some glycogen to burn off after yesterday, so I started my gym workout with a 5 mph run for 12 minutes (1 mile). It was easier than usual. Then I did my weights. The extra weight I'm carrying made some exercises harder. Then 18 minutes on the stairmaster for an even half hour of hard cardio, then back to the treadmill for my usual 20 minute walk at 3.5 mph.

I'm going to go ahead and start my cheat day count over even though I didn't totally fall off the wagon. So that makes today day 1.

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Sabbaths and Sundays, Common Proof Texts, #6

Claim: Galatians says we are not to observe "days," therefore we shouldn't keep the Sabbath.
Howbeit then, when ye knew not God, ye did service unto them which by nature are no gods. But now, after that ye have known God, or rather are known of God, how turn ye again to the weak and beggarly elements, whereunto ye desire again to be in bondage? Ye observe days, and months, and times, and years. I am afraid of you, lest I have bestowed upon you labour in vain. (Galatians 4:8-11)

The Galatians were in danger of going back to paganism. After all, how can they "desire again to be in bondage" if they were not in bondage in the first place? And surely they had not previously been in bondage to the Jewish law (see Bacchiocchi quote below).

The RSV has an interesting translation of verse 9, translating "beggarly elements" as "beggarly elemental spirits." "Elemental spirits" could indeed refer to Pagan practices of worshipping other gods.

Let me quote Samuele Bacchiocchi, since he is much more the scholar than I: "It is generally agreed that the Galatians' observance of sacred times was motivated by superstitious beliefs in astral influences. This is suggested by Paul's charge that their adoption of these practices was tantamount to a return to their former pagan subjection to elemental spirits and demons...Paul's concern was not to expose the superstitious ideas attached to these observances, but rather to challenge the whole system of salvation which the Galatians' false teachers had devised...by conditioning justification and acceptance with God to such things as circumcision and the observance of days and seasons..." (The Sabbath in the New Testament, page 122.)

He goes on to state that this is works-based salvation dependant on "human achievement." Galatians 5:4 seems to back up this interpretation: "You have been severed from Christ, you who are seeking to be justified by law; you have fallen from grace."

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Another new low!

Weight this morning: 140.2!!! Another new low today! Yippee!
Calories eaten yesterday: 1788
Calories burned: 1918
Carbs: 44g (good)
Fat: 79g (really good considering the number of calories)

Today marks 32 days cheat free for me. Yay! I'm doing so well I don't want to screw it up with a cheat, but I am craving the taste of all those carby foods. Just the taste though. I absolutely hate what they do to my body and how they make me feel. Sugar is any form (even natural) forces the pancreas to produce insulin, the "fat storage" hormone. Why would I want a hormone that causes fat storage coursing through my body?

Not sure what will happen today. I'm going to keep my menu in my head and measure things out so that if I end up being able to count I can fill in FitDay later. I told April I didn't feel like traipsing out to Rob's house by bus, but that if cousin JJ wants to come up here to my house and pick me up after getting her at Rob's house, I will be home and willing to go out with them. Besides which, I way overslept this morning and didn't wake up until almost 12:30! Yike! I guess I was tired.

My once skin-tight Calvin Klein size 8 jeans shorts are now a little looser. I hardly have to suck my tummy in to button them, even when they are fresh from the drier. :) And they are almost loose by the time they're stretched out. Last summer I couldn't wear them all. Thank you, Dr. Atkins!

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Day 24

Weight this morning: 141 even
Calories eaten yesterday: 1951
Calories burned: 1917
Carbs: 46g (good)
Fat: 98g (yippee!)

Yeah, I ate more than I burned. I was really hungry and craving, so I threw in a sugar free chocolate bar. It was delicious.

Back up to 141 today. I can live with that. :) I'm so happy to have finally lost some weight. I've been stalled too long. For the first time in forever I truly like my body. It looks good and responds to what I ask of it easily.

Today is day 31 cheat free. I really want to binge, but I am doing so good and know what will happen if I do fall off the wagon even for a day. I'm worried about this weekend more than anything.

Plans for the weekend include dinner at a mystery restaurant on Friday night with April and some of her friends, then the church potluck Saturday and then a BBQ at Rob's until about 10 pm. April also wants to get together Sunday day. I am resisting because I really want to go to the gym after eating all weekend.

I did find time to walk to work today. FitDay says 89 calories burned. I need that today especially because today is my long day - I changed the bed this morning and have to do the laundry and cook next week's lunches tonight. To console myself for this flurry of activity I have a little more wine. ;) At any rate, calories are a bit higher today so I need to burn as much as I can.

It's been sooo hot the past three days. I've been drinking Diet Coke like it's going out of style. Today I bought a 20 oz. bottle at the store and drank that on the way home. Then after walking to work I stopped at the gas station and got one of those huge 44 oz. cups and filled that with Diet Coke. My little weather pixie on the left is wearing summer clothes I have rarely seen before. It's even warm at night and I sleep with the window by my bad open. When I left for work today I left both a living room window and the kitchen window open, in addition to the usual front window I leave half open all seasons for the cats.

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Money, Honey

I'm so not having fun with money. I have three huge bills that I have to cover. There no money in savings because I recently paid for my August vacation and caught up on some bills. And the last money Dad sent me went for my medication and some bills. I got some reimbursement for my medication back, and I am planning on rolling that money into this.

In order of importance:

1) I have to pay up my Internet for a year. I get $2 off per month when I do it this way, which amounts to just over one month free, but it means coming up with roughly $240 all at once.

2) I'm due for my yearly cholesterol test, and the doctor ordered a complete metabolic panel as well. He said Celexa could cause liver or kidney problems. I know I'm fine, but whatever. Yes, I do get "health assistance" from work, but I have to pay everything out of pocket and then wait for reimbursement of part. Also, I already have the paperwork in hand and it won't "keep" forever. I need to go in and get this done ASAP. I wonder how long before I get another check from Dad?

3) I got an e-mail from my vet reminding me that Xena is due for her rabies shot. I'm pretty sure she'll be due for a distemper shot and an annual exam come fall, so I'm putting this one off and hoping I'll have the money and just get everything done at once. She's healthy and a 100% indoor cat, so she's not exactly high risk. If she were to get sick, I'd take her in, money or no money.

She also needs a nail trim and she won't let me do it so this is another "vet" thing, but that is the least of my worries.

On the "how stupid is this" side of things, I recently bought a case of Sam Adams Light beer. "Light" is supposed to be lower in carbs. Then I read this past week in She Knows Diet & Fitness that Sam Adams Light has almost twice the carbs of Corona Light (9.6 vs. 5 if I remember right)! Yike! I guess I'll be giving Brad the Sam Adams when he drops over and I now have to come up with some money for Corona Light. I don't drink beer often, but I feel better knowing the option is there if I want it.

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New low!

Weight this morning: 140.4!!! A new low! Yippee! My previous low was 141.

I think I will go ahead and revise my goal down. On the old Met Life chart, I'm supposed to weigh 128-143 (I'm in that range finally - yay!). On the new Met Life chart, I'm supposed to weigh 133-147. Other ideal body weights (bottom of this page) range between 134 and 138. The 1972 Atkins book says I should weigh 124-139. Interestingly enough, Atkins' 2002 book doesn't use a height/weight chart - it uses the BMI tables, which don't take frame size into account. Anyway, let's shoot for 138. (Based on Miller's formula; see bottom of this page.)

I thought my weight would be up today because of the salty meat I ate yesterday and how thirsty I was in the morning, but I guess with the heat the salt didn't hurt me. It's been SO hot lately.

Calories eaten yesterday: 1691
Calories burned: 2079
Carbs: 41g (good)
Fat: 75g (lower than I wanted, but not bad for the number of calories)

Today marks 30 days cheat free for me. Yay!

Didn't make it to the gym today because I had an appointment to see my podiatrist. Anyone seen those Lamisil commercials? That's what I have. But the doctor won't give me those pills, so we're doing this the slow way.

Walked over 10,000 steps yesterday, including the exercise I did at the gym.


Walked the last mile and a half to work today from the BART station. FitDay says 91 calories.

I've come to the conclusion that after losing 65 pounds, my hanging pouch of tummy is loose skin and not fat. Certainly not enough to warrant a tummy tuck, but there it is and it won't go away no matter how much I lose.

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Week 3 Weigh-In

Week 0: 144
Week 1: 147.2 (+3.2 lbs.)
Week 2: 143.2 (-4 lbs.)
Week 3: 141 (-2.2 lbs.)

Total loss: 3 lbs.

Three pounds in three weeks. I can live with that. :)

Did pretty well yesterday.
Calories eaten: 1606
Calories burned: 1949
Carbs: 34g (yippee!)
Fat: 77g (lower than I wanted, but not bad for the number of calories)

I updated my ticker. Doesn't it look good to lose weight? :)

Since yesterday was lower calorie, today will be higher. And I had to add a protein drink because it was a gym day. Yippee! I love going to the gym. :) I had no energy though. I don't know if I was just tired, or if it was the lower than usual number of carbs yesterday. I feel much better (and have more energy) at about 60g a day.

I think today's low number had to be some dehydration. Sure, it's a hot day out, but I was drinking tons and tons of water. This is the second time recently that I've seen 141, so that's good. I'll get where I'm going. It's just going to take time.

I'll be up next week due to 1) the potluck at church Saturday, 2) the BBQ at Rob's the rest of the day after that (and very likely mixed drinks that I need to turn down), and 3) possibly dinner at Eleanor's Friday night. I can eat low-carb - that's not an issue - but the calories will easily derail me. Plus with such a low low this week, I know I'll bounce up next week. That's okay. As long as I stay under my start weight of 144 I'm okay. I also want my nighttime weigh-ins to be under 147.

I know my goal is 142, but I'll confide a secret here - I'd really like to be at least 141 (not just hit it and bounce back like today) because that's an even 65 pounds lost and I get the cool chick graphic above. And 141 is so close to 140 for a nice even number. And 140 is so close to the 130s. So I really would like to lose a few more pounds. We'll see. I can't go hungry forever, but losing is, in so many ways, easier than maintenance. Maintenance really scares me because I tried it before and failed.

I may be switching my weigh-in day to Monday, in accordance with this group I joined. This group is targeted toward Atkins people who are in Maintenance or Pre-Maintenance and have lost at least 90% of the weight they needed to. I looked at some of the other challenge threads in that folder, but they mostly seemed to be race threads - who could lose 5 pounds the fastest, or who could lose the most by a certain date. Since I am doomed to failure in a race of this sort I didn't join any. I lose slow and I just need a group to keep me accountable and losing - even at a slow rate.

I'm sure by now everyone has noticed my "cheat free for x days" graphic. Who wants to take a bet on how many days I'll go until my next binge? Just add a comment with the number of days you think I'll hold out. :)


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Chick graphic courtesy 3 Fat Chicks.

What kind of junk food are you?

You are practical, straightforward and unpretentious. While you may not be the best communicator, people appreciate your simplicity and modesty!

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Day 21

Weight this morning: 142 even
Calories eaten yesterday: 1858
Calories burned: 2084
Carbs: 45g (good)
Fat: 90g (yippee!)

Didn't make it to the gym because it was my bimonthly City run to get my mail. The latest (and very possibly last) issue of She Knows Diet and Fitness was there, along with my replacement picture from SportPhoto. Would you believe they spelled my name wrong on the photo?!? Who the heck are these people?!?

I did manage to walk to work from the BART station, and then did some laps around the hallway here at work for a total of 40 minutes of walking and 118 calories burned. I should be able to get to the gym tomorrow.

Walked over 10,000 steps yesterday, and I finally figured out why my pedometer shots were coming out blurry - I had my digital camera set on "mountain mode" instead of "flower mode." Once I flicked that switch to the flower position, I started getting much clearer shots. :)


Tomorrow is the official weigh-in. Last week's weight was 143.2. This morning I was 142 (my official goal). I know I need to drink lots of water today to keep myself hydrated so my body won't hold on to extra water, but with TOM here, the taste of plain water makes me nauseous. Looks like I'll be drinking a lot of tea and diet soda. I have Diet Rite and diet Hansen's, both of which also have no caffeine or sodium.

I'll update my ticker tomorrow morning. Expect a post about my weigh-in stats and everything that afternoon.

I called Dad last night to wish him a happy Father's Day, and he said he talked to April and would pay for my plane ticket to visit for Thanksgiving. So it looks like I am going and I'll be doing a lot of cooking. I don't know what traditional dishes I might be forced to make/sit near, but I will get through this Thanksgiving without wrecking my blood sugar like last year!

Speaking of visiting my sister, she'll be in town this weekend and that means very few meals at home and little control over what I eat for two solid days. I offered to bring a dish to Rob's BBQ on Saturday afternoon, and asked him to provide chicken with no sauce so that I could have something to eat (BBQ sauce is mostly sugar). So I can hopefully eat some chicken, and bring something like baked eggplant and then just stick to those dishes. As for alcohol, I'll ask if they have regular wine and skip the mixed drinks. April also wants me to go to Eleanor's house on Friday night. *sigh* She doesn't know what it's like to merely look at food and gain. At least with Eleanor it's easier to stay on plan - she always has wine, meat, and veggies, and then I just pass on the potatoes and dessert.

Speaking of dessert, TOM is making me want chocolate today, and the dessert left for Lisa's birthday yesterday turned out to be brownies. I gave in to one bite - and only one - and then gave it back to Lynn. Lynn told me where she put it, but out of sight is out of mind. I'm just at a place right now where sitting 15 feet from a pan of brownies is NOT a good idea.

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Third weekend

Weight this morning: 143 even
Calories eaten yesterday: 1725
Calories burned: 1892
Carbs: 60g (higher than I wanted)
Fat: 64g (WAY to low)

I think I did pretty good yesterday. I'm hoping the last two days of gaining won't see my gaining all my lost weight back and that it's just due to eating lots of salty meat the last two days. No more of that meat for me until after my weigh-in on Tuesday!

April (sister) and I got into a huge argument over Thanksgiving. She wants Dad and I to come, and if I won't eat carby food, then I have to cook an Atkins meal. :-p Oh fun. I 1) hate cooking, especially for 2) my family for 3) a holiday. :-p

Made it to the gym this morning. I did 30 minutes of weights (core and arms), 20 on the pedal-type stairmaster (pictured above), 10 on the elliptical, and 20 minutes walking 3.5 mph. FitDay says 267 calories burned. I didn't do any exercise yesterday. After church I just lounged around the house.

Looks like TOM's here. Oh fun. I've already been dealing with wanting chocolate (and did have a sugar free bar on Friday night). I used to have a whoosh right after TOM, but that hasn't happened in over a year now.


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Picture courtesy Home Gym Equipment Guide.