Brian's words are in italics.
Brian said:
Lembas bread, he [Tolkien] said, is chemically, physically, atomically, and every other way indistinguishable from ordinary bread. It is special not because of what it is made of, but because it is the gift of the Lady and through her of the Valar and through them Eru Illuvatar himself. There is an enchantment -- perhaps better, a grace -- upon it, that makes it different.
Tolkien was Catholic, so that would fit his theology perfectly. I can't explain it yet, but I do know that now I have experienced it as more than a symbol. That's why I wanted to go to City Church last week. I literally didn't care about the sermon or who was speaking or anything. I wanted communion. It was also a major reason I went today.
I know...a long distance each way and train fare and such...it was that important. Yet I can't explain why except to say there's a grace I find there.
Of course, we wouldn't have been able to do this, I expect, if you would pray for them. Not a bad idea for you to be doing that, is it?
Hmmm? I'm learning to pray for the people at EW. And yes, I can pray for the guy who mugged me. I haven't just because it's slipped my mind, but the whole thing happened so fast that praying for him hasn't been an issue.
Walking with Christ, I got no revenge. Instead, I got reconciliation. I got my friend back.
It's the Via Dolorosa. It is hard, but you are right. It is the better way. The book I read talked a lot about reconciliation, too. Thank you for being open to it and for standing with me in my moment of pain.
I've talked to you before about forgiveness, but I didn't understand until I got there. It's like we're in a jungle. You're ahead of me somewhere, and we each have a walkie-talkie. You tell me about a bridge you crossed called "forgiveness." I stumbled around a while, chasing down rabbit trails and otherwise not walking the path I should. Eventually, I decide to head for the bridge. I asked you to describe it, how to cross it, etc. I have a mental picture. But the reality of getting to the bridge, stepping onto it, etc. is so different than someone explaining.
God, why am I so darned happy? :)
Seriously, as crazy as it sounds, I thank Him for everything that's happened. I have learned SO much that I will be able to use in the future. I have seen - personally - her powerlessness in the face of Him. That's why the line from that song touched me today - I know it to be true.
I never would have thought such good could come of something so awful, so depressing, something that nearly made me give up my faith and walk away from Christ. And yet the morning sunshine pouring in through the window blinds is brighter than any I have ever seen. It's DIFFERENT. It's not the same sunshine I experienced nearly two years ago when I first felt He was using me and I was so excited. Remember that? Well, this is BETTER.
It's beautiful, wonderful. He's beautiful. *sniff*
When I arrived at work today, I couldn't help but think, "What have I ever done to deserve being so blessed?" The answer of course is "nothing." It's His gift because He loves me.
Words fail me. As a writer there is nothing more frustrating than to try to explain something about God and run out of words because He's so far beyond them.
Bless you and everyone else here [note: at the CH Refugee forum] who stood with me as I slogged forward, sometimes falling, each time eventually getting up to continue toward the goal. I couldn't have done it without you, and I am so glad God has brought me here. I have never seen Romans 8:28 proven so true in my life.
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