As most of you know, I have to take a prescription medication to be able to function like normal people. Well, I tried to call my doctor today to make another appointment. The receptionist said they don't take psych patients anymore and that they are referring them out to psychiatrists. Well, psych docs charge a lot more and insist on seeing you once a month, AND my company only pays for half the cost, not 80% like with a regular doc. Oh, and the yearly cap is lower. It wouldn't work. I can't afford both my medicine AND to see a psych every month.
Besides which, it's MY disease and MY body and I'm an adult - I can decide how often I need to see a doctor for reevaluation.
Anyway, our health person here at work, Lupe, thinks the real reason the doc won't see me is because I was late once paying my bill. The receptionist on the phone tried to tell me that they really aren't seeing psych patients anymore and that she told me all this at my last visit. NO SHE DIDN'T. She's LYING and thinks I won't notice?!? I liked the doctor, too.
So now I have to start over AGAIN (for the third time) with a new doctor. Lupe said not to mention anything when signing up for the initial appointment and to only mention it once I'm there. I have an initial intake appointment scheduled for Sept. 17 at the cost of over $150 that I don't have.
Needless to say, I'm highly stressed, pissed, and upset over this whole game.
God promised me a long time ago that He would make sure I could always get my medicine and not to worry about the money, but each time I have to start over I worry that He will fail me and that I will go without. Life off the medicine is a living hell, and to be honest, God means little in that state. I would kill myself sooner or later. That's not a threat; it's a sad statement of fact.
Anyway, your prayers on this would be appreciated. Remind God of His promise to me.
I don't know how I will get through this, especially seeing as how my rent is going from $500 to $700 next month.
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