A little more detail about today. I was really tired last night. I accidentally reset my clock while trying to set the alarm, so I ended up getting up at 7 a.m. Saturday morning instead of 8. Bleh. Anyway, I went to bed really early on Saturday night and slept a good 10-11 hours. I feel much better today. I forced Xena to sleep on my bed and instead of sleeping at the bottom of the bed or in her box on the bed, she curled up right next to me, so close that it was hard to turn over. :)
Got up at 9, so I could have extra time at the gym. I went to the Bayfair 24 Hour Fitness that has the lap pool. I did 20 minutes on the pedal stairmaster. I still had some spare time so I did 10 minutes on the treadmill at 3.5 mph (a nice fast walking pace, but not too fast). Gotta burn those calories from the ice cream yesterday. I sweated so much.
Then I stripped off my workout clothes and my swimsuit was beneath. I went into the pool. Swam around for about 25 minutes, then got in the whirlpool for 10 minutes, then back to the pool for another 10 minutes. I was only going to do 30 total, but I went for 35 because, again, I need to burn the calories from the ice cream. By this point I could feel myself getting tired. The whole thing is more cardio than I am used to. Back in the whirlpool for another 10 minutes, then step on the scale in the women's dressing room, then strip down and get dressed in my civilian clothes. ;) I had an Atkins shake for the protein content while I walked back to the BART station.
A great day at the gym. I love swimming, even if it's boring lap swimming, and then I get to end the workout with the whirlpool. :) I can't swim, but I can dog paddle and float on my back and the pool is so shallow I can walk from end to end.
Sunday, February 27, 2005
Monday, February 21, 2005
I *get* it now! (Lewis and Tolkein)
Been reading "That Hideous Strength" lately. Due to an intense "read through the Bible in a year program," I still haven't finished the book. I don't allow myself to read the book unless my Bible reading for the day is done.
Anyway, Lewis talks a bit about Numinor, the "true west," and Middle Earth in the book. While I was reading yesterday it suddenly hit me where Middle Earth is. I always thought it was a fictional place, but in "Lord of the Rings" Tolkein was providing a history of OUR PLANET! We are Middle Earth. Above is the heavens, and below is hell, and we are in between, caught, in a sense, between the worlds.
I read the entire Lord of the Rings book (all 1006 pages) and never understood that. I read something totally unrelated and it hits me! :)
Anyway, Lewis talks a bit about Numinor, the "true west," and Middle Earth in the book. While I was reading yesterday it suddenly hit me where Middle Earth is. I always thought it was a fictional place, but in "Lord of the Rings" Tolkein was providing a history of OUR PLANET! We are Middle Earth. Above is the heavens, and below is hell, and we are in between, caught, in a sense, between the worlds.
I read the entire Lord of the Rings book (all 1006 pages) and never understood that. I read something totally unrelated and it hits me! :)
Carb overdose
Oh God. I didn't realize how bad carbs are until I ODed tonight. I can hardly keep my eyes open and I still have an hour left at work. I'm so tired. This sucks. I look forward to getting my energy back tomorrow as I detox. Bleh. Oh God, bleh. I feel awful. *yawn*
This, boys and girls, is why we're doing Atkins. In a word - energy. Did I really feel like this before starting Atkins? I can't fathom it. I hate this feeling.
This, boys and girls, is why we're doing Atkins. In a word - energy. Did I really feel like this before starting Atkins? I can't fathom it. I hate this feeling.
Fell off the wagon (again)
Well, I fell off the wagon again. I just couldn't take another day being good. Both Hegenbergers and the burrito place were closed, so I ordered pizza at work. It took two hours and several phone calls before they delivered a luke warm pizza. I was so not amused.
Of course, extra carbs make me thirsty (and make my body hold onto that water), so I'll be bloated up like a balloon tomorrow. Fun fun - NOT!
Took Xena to the vet today to get her claws clipped. She's been scratching me a lot and when that happens I know it's time to blunt those suckers.
Since I had to drop Xena off before heading to work, and there was a Safeway nearby, I stopped in and bought a bunch of low carb ice cream. I hope I got it home without it melting too bad, but the busses were on a holiday schedule and it took forever to get home, drop off Xena and the ice cream, and rush off to work. It was on and off pouring rain through all this.
Writing from bloatsville,
Victoria
:(
Of course, extra carbs make me thirsty (and make my body hold onto that water), so I'll be bloated up like a balloon tomorrow. Fun fun - NOT!
Took Xena to the vet today to get her claws clipped. She's been scratching me a lot and when that happens I know it's time to blunt those suckers.
Since I had to drop Xena off before heading to work, and there was a Safeway nearby, I stopped in and bought a bunch of low carb ice cream. I hope I got it home without it melting too bad, but the busses were on a holiday schedule and it took forever to get home, drop off Xena and the ice cream, and rush off to work. It was on and off pouring rain through all this.
Writing from bloatsville,
Victoria
:(
Sunday, February 20, 2005
Anniversary of working out
I figured what better way to celebrate the anniversary of beginning to exercise than by exercising (2/19/04)! So I jumped on my really old, rusted stationary bike at home. Everything was going find until about 15 minutes in it started making so much noise I couldn't hear the TV, and I was trying to catch up on some stuff I taped. So I hopped off and just jogged in place and from one end of the apartment to the other for another 15 minutes. I'd intended to bike for a half hour so I figured that would make up for it.
My orange tabby, Abby, the feral one, was perched at the top of the cat tree looking at me real weird. lol They freak out any time I act different from normal. They've gotten used to the bike, but I rarely run in place for exercise.
My orange tabby, Abby, the feral one, was perched at the top of the cat tree looking at me real weird. lol They freak out any time I act different from normal. They've gotten used to the bike, but I rarely run in place for exercise.
Speaking at church (end of March), take 2
Talked to pastor about how it was scheduled for Easter weekend and did he want to change that? I told him it didn't really matter to me, that if he had something special planned that Sabbath that I would totally understand. In the end he decided to take that weekend and bump me up to the weekend previous - the Saturday before Palm Sunday.
I get to pick the songs but it was suggested that along with "All Glory, Laud, and Honor" - a typical Palm Sunday song - that I also include some Good Friday songs, since by the next service we'll already be past Good Friday. So I get to pick the songs, but due to Palm Sunday and Easter week, I pretty much need to pick those type songs.
This is the only time during the year when going to a Sabbath keeping church feels weird. All the church festivals are always on Sunday and so we're always a day ahead, or in the case of Good Friday, a day behind. Sabbath worship on Easter weekend always feels weird to me. We usually do one or two Good Friday songs, and a couple Easter Sunday songs. It's just feels so schizophrenic to me somehow. It's also the one time during the year when I am sure to attend Sunday services, for Palm and Easter Sunday, as well as Good Friday as I have that day off work.
I get to pick the songs but it was suggested that along with "All Glory, Laud, and Honor" - a typical Palm Sunday song - that I also include some Good Friday songs, since by the next service we'll already be past Good Friday. So I get to pick the songs, but due to Palm Sunday and Easter week, I pretty much need to pick those type songs.
This is the only time during the year when going to a Sabbath keeping church feels weird. All the church festivals are always on Sunday and so we're always a day ahead, or in the case of Good Friday, a day behind. Sabbath worship on Easter weekend always feels weird to me. We usually do one or two Good Friday songs, and a couple Easter Sunday songs. It's just feels so schizophrenic to me somehow. It's also the one time during the year when I am sure to attend Sunday services, for Palm and Easter Sunday, as well as Good Friday as I have that day off work.
San Leandro 24 Hour Fitness, take 2
Went swimming at the San Leandro 24 Hour Fitness this morning. Just boring lap swimming, but I liked the tight feeling of the swimsuit on my body and the feeling of the water on my arms and legs. Did that for about a half hour total.
Weighed myself before going in the pool in my shower shoes and my bathing suit (less clothes than I usually wear to weigh). I came out to about 160, so I haven't really gained from indulging the last 3 days! :) Maybe a teeny bit, but only a teeny difference. I'm back on the wagon today and keeping a closer eye on my calories.
As weird as it sounds, I can't wait for TOM so I can break this 160 mark and get into the 150s.
Weighed myself before going in the pool in my shower shoes and my bathing suit (less clothes than I usually wear to weigh). I came out to about 160, so I haven't really gained from indulging the last 3 days! :) Maybe a teeny bit, but only a teeny difference. I'm back on the wagon today and keeping a closer eye on my calories.
As weird as it sounds, I can't wait for TOM so I can break this 160 mark and get into the 150s.
Saturday, February 19, 2005
One Year Ago Today
One year ago yesterday I decided I weighed too much and signed up at Curves. One year ago today I did my first workout. :) One year ago today I began to change my life. One year ago today I started to do something about my weight. I didn't begin Atkins until later. This is just the anniversary of beginning to excercise.
Yea me!
Yea me!
Friday, February 18, 2005
"Psalm"
Today I met Psalm (Sarah) from the Depression forum where I used to hang out before the betrayal. Anyway, I met Psalm in the chat room and a couple of weeks ago she contacted me to say that her and her husband would be here and would I like to meet her? Of course I jumped at the chance. They met me in the lobby, and we went to Starbucks, then walked down to and through Chinatown for some light shopping. Then back to the hotel and her husband Richard went up to the room while Sarah and I sat in one of the restaurants and talked alone. Then she had to get ready for dinner so we parted. Sarah and I have stuff in common. I hope we can maintain contact after she gets back home, and I hope her husband comes around and realizes his infidelity is HIS fault, and his alone, and he needs to stop. I pray strength for Psalm to endure the emotional roller coaster she is now on. God bless you, Sarah.
Overate
Overate today. It was the low carb Carl's Jr. burger. I would have been pretty close to my calorie allotment if I had skipped it. But I was having such a good time, I thought a burger and book would only make it better. :) Only 4 net carbs, but way too many calories. And yesterday I ate 2300. God, I am such a failure. :(
This is sooo going to make me gain. :(
This is sooo going to make me gain. :(
Thursday, February 17, 2005
Won't be able to count
I just remembered I may not be able to count tomorrow. I have a meal plan done, but I am meeting someone I met online tomorrow. Her and her hubby are staying in San Francisco, and I'm going to meet them at their hotel tomorrow afternoon. If we have any more than coffee, I won't have any way of counting it.
I have an outstanding dinner planned if I don't eat out with them: Dreamfield's pasta, marinara sauce, and mixed with peas and Louis Rich Southwestern chicken. Mix all ingredients and serve on a big plate, lol.
I guess I can always have it Saturday night instead. I do hope I'm home in time for Joan of Arcadia.
I have an outstanding dinner planned if I don't eat out with them: Dreamfield's pasta, marinara sauce, and mixed with peas and Louis Rich Southwestern chicken. Mix all ingredients and serve on a big plate, lol.
I guess I can always have it Saturday night instead. I do hope I'm home in time for Joan of Arcadia.
I usually work out three times a week. This week I went 4, but didn't push myself very hard yesterday or today, so I figure 2 half workouts make a whole. ;)
Today I did 40 minutes of light cardio, twice as much as usual, and only a couple of weights.
Then I took BART to work and was early, so I went to Carrow's (similar to Denny's) and ordered a diet Coke and read my book at the counter. But the wine list looked good so I got a glass of white wine to drink with my book, and then I went to work feeling better than usual, lol!
Today I did 40 minutes of light cardio, twice as much as usual, and only a couple of weights.
Then I took BART to work and was early, so I went to Carrow's (similar to Denny's) and ordered a diet Coke and read my book at the counter. But the wine list looked good so I got a glass of white wine to drink with my book, and then I went to work feeling better than usual, lol!
160!
Woohoo! I got on the scale today and hit a new low - 160 even! 1 more pound to be in a "healthy" weight range! :) Dowell saw me step on the scale and said "It won't be any different than yesterday," but it always is, sometimes up and sometimes down. I was down 0.75 of a pound, putting me at a new low - in the middle of the month! Woohoo! I am flying high!
Wednesday, February 16, 2005
On track
Well, restricting carbs for the last 3 days did the trick. I'm back down to 160.75 today. That was my post-period low this month, so look out when next month comes!
My body fat is 28.2% - slowly dropping. I hope to update my measurements on my Web site soon, maybe tonight.
Ate a banana today. So unfulfilling for the carbs involved. For the same number of carbs I can have a good sized apple, and it's crunchy and takes longer to eat.
My body fat is 28.2% - slowly dropping. I hope to update my measurements on my Web site soon, maybe tonight.
Ate a banana today. So unfulfilling for the carbs involved. For the same number of carbs I can have a good sized apple, and it's crunchy and takes longer to eat.
Tuesday, February 15, 2005
Doing better
Doing pretty good after the disaster Friday/Saturday was. Sunday I ate 1862 calories and 36 carbs. 100g of fat. Monday I ate 1869 calories and 41 carbs (that includes two glasses of wine). 79g of fat. I'm on target so far today, but I just got up. ;) Hopefully tomorrow I can start adding low carb sweets back in again. My tentative menu today has 45 carbs.
By the way, those low carb Campbell's soups are good. :)
By the way, those low carb Campbell's soups are good. :)
Sunday, February 13, 2005
Speaking at church (end of March)
As many of you are aware, our pastor takes one Sabbath a month off because it's...well, he doesn't want to burn out seeing as he works 40 hours a week for a Japanese firm as a technical writer to support his family. So anyway, he get one Sabbath off, usually the last one. It's a struggle every month to pull off a service when you depend on your pastor so heavily.
Anyway, a while back someone said I should give my testimony to the church, so I offered to be the speaker for the end of March. Many of the people in the church have heard the short version, but besides some of the older kids and their Sabbath School teacher, no one has heard the long version. I also gave a short version at Conference a few years ago.
The long version ran about 23 minutes when I first gave it years ago to the woman's ministry at my old church, and I still have all my notes. here's hoping it goes well.
Oh...I checked my calendar and that Sabbath is Holy Saturday, Easter weekend.
Anyway, a while back someone said I should give my testimony to the church, so I offered to be the speaker for the end of March. Many of the people in the church have heard the short version, but besides some of the older kids and their Sabbath School teacher, no one has heard the long version. I also gave a short version at Conference a few years ago.
The long version ran about 23 minutes when I first gave it years ago to the woman's ministry at my old church, and I still have all my notes. here's hoping it goes well.
Oh...I checked my calendar and that Sabbath is Holy Saturday, Easter weekend.
San Leandro 24 Hour Fitness
Went swimming at the San Leandro 24 Hour Fitness. They have a small lap pool, but it was just nice to wear my new suit and get in the water. I was in and out of the pool a few times, but I think the total time in came to around 40 minutes.
This facility is bigger with more machines (of all kinds), but I like my home club. At least I know where everything is. But hey - now I can go swimming anytime I want! :) I rinsed off afterward, but I still smell like chlorine.
Bought a bunch of cool low carb foods at Target. It's so close to the BART station. I could go shopping there anytime I want. I join 24 Hour and my world starts getting larger. :) Anyway, I even found sugar free Almond Roca! Finally! I kept looking at the boxes hoping against hope they'd come out with one.
This facility is bigger with more machines (of all kinds), but I like my home club. At least I know where everything is. But hey - now I can go swimming anytime I want! :) I rinsed off afterward, but I still smell like chlorine.
Bought a bunch of cool low carb foods at Target. It's so close to the BART station. I could go shopping there anytime I want. I join 24 Hour and my world starts getting larger. :) Anyway, I even found sugar free Almond Roca! Finally! I kept looking at the boxes hoping against hope they'd come out with one.
San Leandro 24 Hour Fitness
Went swimming at the San Leandro 24 Hour Fitness. They have a small lap pool, but it was just nice to wear my new suit and get in the water. I was in and out of the pool a few times, but I think the total time in came to around 40 minutes.
This facility is bigger with more machines (of all kinds), but I like my home club. At least I know where everything is. But hey - now I can go swimming anytime I want! :) I rinsed off afterward, but I still smell like chlorine.
Bought a bunch of cool low carb foods at Target. It's so close to the BART station. I could go shopping there anytime I want. I join 24 Hour and my world starts getting larger. :) Anyway, I even found sugar free Almond Roca! Finally! I kept looking at the boxes hoping against hope they'd come out with one.
This facility is bigger with more machines (of all kinds), but I like my home club. At least I know where everything is. But hey - now I can go swimming anytime I want! :) I rinsed off afterward, but I still smell like chlorine.
Bought a bunch of cool low carb foods at Target. It's so close to the BART station. I could go shopping there anytime I want. I join 24 Hour and my world starts getting larger. :) Anyway, I even found sugar free Almond Roca! Finally! I kept looking at the boxes hoping against hope they'd come out with one.
Saturday, February 12, 2005
Bad eating weekend
Did terrible this weekend. After not being hungry all week, I was starving on Friday. I ate 2500 calories and 97 carbs! Ok, I can still recover Saturday and do good. Wrong! We were invited to Brent's house and I didn't think Anita (my ride to and from church) would go. I can deal with lunch since Saturday lunch always has more carbs than usual, but that's normal for Saturday lunch. However, I'm usually home for dinner and have more control. Not so today. Anita decided to go.
For snack when we arrived we had white cheddar Cheetos and apples. I was hungry and ate quite a few apple slices, and just a few Cheetos (if I *have* to eat carbs, might as well make it healthy carbs). Finally we got to dinner. They cooked spaghetti! I had some of Jane's homemade cole slaw (ok, I had a lot - it was homemade so lower in sugar), and some other kind of salad. After eating so bad for the past 36 hours my cravings were back, so I found the smallest slice of garlic bread and ate that (God, it was GOOD!). I figured I had to have some of the main course, so I broke down and had a plate of spaghetti. I put alfredo sauce on it rather than marinara (they had both) because it is lower in carbs. The spaghetti was overcooked and didn't even taste good! :(
So now my cravings are back so I've got to cut back on carbs for a few days to make them go away. I soooo wanted dessert, but I promised myself a low carb dessert when I got home. I nearly broke down though. Reading the package on the cherry cobbler helped me to stay away. Six servings per box and 50 carbs per serving!
Tomorrow I'm eating tons of meat and cheese and some veggies. My tentative menu has 42 carbs. Starting tomorrow, I'm going to try to stay away from all candy and sweets except sugar free Jello for at least a few days until I can get my cravings under control again. I learned an important lesson - 97 carbs are too much! 85-92g is doable, but on the edge of making me crave. I need to be more careful.
I'm not even going to weigh myself. I know I gained water weight from the sheer number of carbs. So I am staying away from the scale until at least Tuesday.
On a lighter note, I got myself lined up to be the speaker at church the last Sabbath in March. I'll give my story of how I became a Christian. :) Our pastor takes the last Sabbath of every month off and they need to fill the pulpit, so this is my perfect opportunity to inflict my story on everyone. ;)
Alright, off for one last fling before I put my nose to the grindstone tomorrow.
For snack when we arrived we had white cheddar Cheetos and apples. I was hungry and ate quite a few apple slices, and just a few Cheetos (if I *have* to eat carbs, might as well make it healthy carbs). Finally we got to dinner. They cooked spaghetti! I had some of Jane's homemade cole slaw (ok, I had a lot - it was homemade so lower in sugar), and some other kind of salad. After eating so bad for the past 36 hours my cravings were back, so I found the smallest slice of garlic bread and ate that (God, it was GOOD!). I figured I had to have some of the main course, so I broke down and had a plate of spaghetti. I put alfredo sauce on it rather than marinara (they had both) because it is lower in carbs. The spaghetti was overcooked and didn't even taste good! :(
So now my cravings are back so I've got to cut back on carbs for a few days to make them go away. I soooo wanted dessert, but I promised myself a low carb dessert when I got home. I nearly broke down though. Reading the package on the cherry cobbler helped me to stay away. Six servings per box and 50 carbs per serving!
Tomorrow I'm eating tons of meat and cheese and some veggies. My tentative menu has 42 carbs. Starting tomorrow, I'm going to try to stay away from all candy and sweets except sugar free Jello for at least a few days until I can get my cravings under control again. I learned an important lesson - 97 carbs are too much! 85-92g is doable, but on the edge of making me crave. I need to be more careful.
I'm not even going to weigh myself. I know I gained water weight from the sheer number of carbs. So I am staying away from the scale until at least Tuesday.
On a lighter note, I got myself lined up to be the speaker at church the last Sabbath in March. I'll give my story of how I became a Christian. :) Our pastor takes the last Sabbath of every month off and they need to fill the pulpit, so this is my perfect opportunity to inflict my story on everyone. ;)
Alright, off for one last fling before I put my nose to the grindstone tomorrow.
Sabbath & Food
Did terrible this weekend. After not being hungry all week, I was starving on Friday. I ate 2500 calories and 97 carbs! Ok, I can still recover Saturday and do good. Wrong! We were invited to Brent's house and I didn't think Anita (my ride to and from church) would go. I can deal with lunch since Satruday lunch always has more carbs than usual, but that's normal for Saturday lunch. However, I'm usually home for dinner and have more control. Not so today. Anita decided to go.
For snack when we arrived we had white chedder Cheetos and apples. I was hungry and ate quite a few apple slices, and just a few Cheetos (if I *have* to eat carbs, might as well make it healthy carbs). Finally we got to dinner. They cooked spaghetti! I had some of Jane's homemade cole slaw (ok, I had a lot - it was homemade so lower in sugar), and some other kind of salad. After eating so bad for the past 36 hours my cravings were back, so I found the smallest slice of garlic bread and ate that (God, it was GOOD!). I figured I had to have some of the main course, so I broke down and had a plate of spaghetti. I put alfredo sauce on it rather than marinara (they had both) because it is lower in carbs. The spaghetti was overcooked and didn't even taste good! :(
So now my cravings are back so I've got to cut back on carbs for a few days to make them go away. I soooo wanted dessert, but I promised myself a low carb dessert when I got home. I nearly broke down though. Reading the package on the cherry cobbler helped me to stay away. Six servings per box and 50 carbs per serving!
Tomorrow I'm eating tons of meat and cheese and some veggies. My tentative menu has 42 carbs. Starting tomorrow, I'm going to try to stay away from all candy and sweets except sugar free Jello for at least a few days until I can get my cravings under control again. I learned an important lesson - 97 carbs are too much! 85-92g is doable, but on the edge of making me crave. I need to be more careful.
I'm not even going to weigh myself. I know I gained water weight from the sheer number of carbs. So I am staying away from the scale until at least Tuesday.
On a lighter note, I got myself lined up to be the speaker at church the last Sabbath in March. I'll give my story of how I became a Christian. :) Our pastor takes the last Sabbath of every month off and they need to fill the pulpit, so this is my perfect opportunity to inflict my story on everyone. ;)
Alright, off for one last fling before I put my nose to the grindstone tomorrow.
For snack when we arrived we had white chedder Cheetos and apples. I was hungry and ate quite a few apple slices, and just a few Cheetos (if I *have* to eat carbs, might as well make it healthy carbs). Finally we got to dinner. They cooked spaghetti! I had some of Jane's homemade cole slaw (ok, I had a lot - it was homemade so lower in sugar), and some other kind of salad. After eating so bad for the past 36 hours my cravings were back, so I found the smallest slice of garlic bread and ate that (God, it was GOOD!). I figured I had to have some of the main course, so I broke down and had a plate of spaghetti. I put alfredo sauce on it rather than marinara (they had both) because it is lower in carbs. The spaghetti was overcooked and didn't even taste good! :(
So now my cravings are back so I've got to cut back on carbs for a few days to make them go away. I soooo wanted dessert, but I promised myself a low carb dessert when I got home. I nearly broke down though. Reading the package on the cherry cobbler helped me to stay away. Six servings per box and 50 carbs per serving!
Tomorrow I'm eating tons of meat and cheese and some veggies. My tentative menu has 42 carbs. Starting tomorrow, I'm going to try to stay away from all candy and sweets except sugar free Jello for at least a few days until I can get my cravings under control again. I learned an important lesson - 97 carbs are too much! 85-92g is doable, but on the edge of making me crave. I need to be more careful.
I'm not even going to weigh myself. I know I gained water weight from the sheer number of carbs. So I am staying away from the scale until at least Tuesday.
On a lighter note, I got myself lined up to be the speaker at church the last Sabbath in March. I'll give my story of how I became a Christian. :) Our pastor takes the last Sabbath of every month off and they need to fill the pulpit, so this is my perfect opportunity to inflict my story on everyone. ;)
Alright, off for one last fling before I put my nose to the grindstone tomorrow.
Thursday, February 10, 2005
Low carb stuff disappears
All the low carb stuff is disappearing! The Doritos phase out finally hit here. I got the last 3 bags of Ranch flavored and today there was something else on the shelves in that spot. :...( I probably have 10 bags stashed under my kitchen sink, lol.
I can probably live with the green candies. Haven't tried them because I haven't much seen them around here. Long's Drugs, but nowhere else. And why buy the green when the red is available? They better not get rid of the toffee squares! They're my fave!
The Post Carb Well cereal is gone, and it's better than Atkins. Atkins is overly sweet. The cinnamon Carb Well was just perfect. And I can't find the low carb Red Baron's pizza, even though I did look for it today. *sigh* Looks like the low carb craze is over. I knew it would happen. Was sure good while it lasted! I just pray that the Carb Options brand products stick around. They have so much cool stuff and it's all good.
Weight-wise I'm frustrated that I'm hovering just inside the 160s and can't seem to break that line. I'm try to do good on my diet and get past that and into the 150s where my goal lies!
Oh, they got rid of the digital scale in the women's dressing room. I knew it was old and gave the wrong weight. They replaced it with a balance scale that seems to give about the same weight as the same scale on the main floor. But I'll probably keep using the one on the main floor since I've always used it.
I can probably live with the green candies. Haven't tried them because I haven't much seen them around here. Long's Drugs, but nowhere else. And why buy the green when the red is available? They better not get rid of the toffee squares! They're my fave!
The Post Carb Well cereal is gone, and it's better than Atkins. Atkins is overly sweet. The cinnamon Carb Well was just perfect. And I can't find the low carb Red Baron's pizza, even though I did look for it today. *sigh* Looks like the low carb craze is over. I knew it would happen. Was sure good while it lasted! I just pray that the Carb Options brand products stick around. They have so much cool stuff and it's all good.
Weight-wise I'm frustrated that I'm hovering just inside the 160s and can't seem to break that line. I'm try to do good on my diet and get past that and into the 150s where my goal lies!
Oh, they got rid of the digital scale in the women's dressing room. I knew it was old and gave the wrong weight. They replaced it with a balance scale that seems to give about the same weight as the same scale on the main floor. But I'll probably keep using the one on the main floor since I've always used it.
Workouts, and calories
Crazy day. Worked out at 24 Hour Fitness. I'm really tired so I couldn't push myself very hard. It's the end of the week and I'm at the end of my energy. My dad sent me $1000 for my b-day, so I went to Safeway and bought $93 worth of groceries, then came to work and used my VitamineShoppe.com coupons and bought $200 worth of stuff - both herbal supplements and low carb food.
Tomorrow I'm hoping to go into Curves for one last weigh and measure before my contract is up.
My weight hasn't bounced around much this week, but I guess that's because I've been so far under my calories most of the week. Check my journal. It's insane. Today I'll probably go over, but I need to seriously adjust my planned menu. At any rate, not much bouncing this week, and under calories most of the time.
Tomorrow I'm hoping to go into Curves for one last weigh and measure before my contract is up.
My weight hasn't bounced around much this week, but I guess that's because I've been so far under my calories most of the week. Check my journal. It's insane. Today I'll probably go over, but I need to seriously adjust my planned menu. At any rate, not much bouncing this week, and under calories most of the time.
Wednesday, February 09, 2005
I'm slowly working on this writing assignment. The deadline is April 1 and I have to have four weeks of devotions churned out by then. What do they give me? Isaiah! The prophets are nearly imcomprehensible and now I have to write devotions on this book?! I'm using my study Bible to help me, plus it's NASB, which capitalizes personal pronouns when it comes to God, including Jesus of course, so it's easy to pick out what the translators feel are Messianic passages in in the Old Testament.
These writing assignments are difficult but I wish I could do them more. Forget the small stipend; I learn something each time I do these because they force me to really dig into the text. I like writing for the sheer joy of sharing my ideas with people I will never meet. I have a passion for the written word.
On that note, my Bible-in-a-year resolution is chugging along. I'm about a week ahead right now. They have us in 7 books (one for each day of the week) at any given time. So far the only book I've finished is Joshua.
Made it to church today to celebrate Ash Wednesday with the imposition of ashes and communion. I'm hiding out at work today as much as possible because people who go to church and/or do things they consider "Catholic" are not highly looked upon here (loooong story). I already got one comment from the guy in the mailroom downstairs. "Your sin will find you out," he said, as if receiving the ashes is wrong (he probably thinks it is).
I did have a bus driver ask me what the mark meant because she had seen it on several people. I explained that it is Ash Wednesday, the beginning of Lent.
The ashes are a sign of repentance and a recognition that we are mortal and will someday die.
What else? I didn't make it to the gym today, but I feel fat and know I've gained. Bleh. :-p Somehow I WILL get there but it is frustrating that I am so close, and yet soooo far.
These writing assignments are difficult but I wish I could do them more. Forget the small stipend; I learn something each time I do these because they force me to really dig into the text. I like writing for the sheer joy of sharing my ideas with people I will never meet. I have a passion for the written word.
On that note, my Bible-in-a-year resolution is chugging along. I'm about a week ahead right now. They have us in 7 books (one for each day of the week) at any given time. So far the only book I've finished is Joshua.
Made it to church today to celebrate Ash Wednesday with the imposition of ashes and communion. I'm hiding out at work today as much as possible because people who go to church and/or do things they consider "Catholic" are not highly looked upon here (loooong story). I already got one comment from the guy in the mailroom downstairs. "Your sin will find you out," he said, as if receiving the ashes is wrong (he probably thinks it is).
I did have a bus driver ask me what the mark meant because she had seen it on several people. I explained that it is Ash Wednesday, the beginning of Lent.
The ashes are a sign of repentance and a recognition that we are mortal and will someday die.
What else? I didn't make it to the gym today, but I feel fat and know I've gained. Bleh. :-p Somehow I WILL get there but it is frustrating that I am so close, and yet soooo far.
Ashes
Well, Ash Wednesday is here. I'm planning on going to a noontime service today and receiving the ashes. This day brings up so many feelings and thoughts - things I don't have time to go into this time of night - but forgiveness is near the forefront. God will treat me the way I treat others, so forgiveness of those who wrong me is SO important - and SO hard. Lord, teach me how to forgive those who hurt me and release them to You and Your mercy.
Monday, February 07, 2005
Well, after the first card disappearing in the mail, my 24 Hour Fitness membership card finally arrived. Good grief! I've been a member for how long using a bar code printed on a sheet of paper because I didn't have my card?!?
The "My Soldier" stuff also arrived. I need to get my butt in gear and write and send that letter. I've been procrastinating for months now.
Went into the City and bought a holder for my iPod. It gets scratched in my gym bag or purse and needed something to protect it. Also hit Old Navy for a second pair of size 10 jeans. While there I saw the cutest tunic that would look fantabulous on me, and it was on sale for $16. It needed a spaghetti strap halter under it, and that was another $8.50. Total damage: about $56. The halter I could fit into a large, but the tunic I needed XL. The L was tight under the arms. Why? Because of my overly large boobs! See what is bad about a big chest? Nothing fits!
Hit GNC and bought a box of Atkins candy bars and some other little candy thing. I like to try new things. Also 2 bottles of Atkins salad dressing that was on sale. They also had 28 little cans of Diet RockStar energy drink on sale for...get this...25 cents each! I think I freaked the ladies out by buying all 28 cans, lol. They are just soooo good and soooo expensive. No way was I passing it up for that price! They are just the 8.4 oz cans, but the regular price is $1.99 PER CAN!
Back to the gym tomorrow. I hope I don't bounce up more, but I'm sure I will. My body seems to really enjoy retaining water and pissing me off.
The "My Soldier" stuff also arrived. I need to get my butt in gear and write and send that letter. I've been procrastinating for months now.
Went into the City and bought a holder for my iPod. It gets scratched in my gym bag or purse and needed something to protect it. Also hit Old Navy for a second pair of size 10 jeans. While there I saw the cutest tunic that would look fantabulous on me, and it was on sale for $16. It needed a spaghetti strap halter under it, and that was another $8.50. Total damage: about $56. The halter I could fit into a large, but the tunic I needed XL. The L was tight under the arms. Why? Because of my overly large boobs! See what is bad about a big chest? Nothing fits!
Hit GNC and bought a box of Atkins candy bars and some other little candy thing. I like to try new things. Also 2 bottles of Atkins salad dressing that was on sale. They also had 28 little cans of Diet RockStar energy drink on sale for...get this...25 cents each! I think I freaked the ladies out by buying all 28 cans, lol. They are just soooo good and soooo expensive. No way was I passing it up for that price! They are just the 8.4 oz cans, but the regular price is $1.99 PER CAN!
Back to the gym tomorrow. I hope I don't bounce up more, but I'm sure I will. My body seems to really enjoy retaining water and pissing me off.
Sunday, February 06, 2005
Ash Wednesday
This is from the newsletter of the Episcopal church I usually attend at Ash Wednesday and Easter. I'm leaving out the stuff I disagree with or that has no bearing on the day itself, but I thought most of it was pretty cool.
"...It is Ash Wednesday, February 9. It is the day when you see some black smudges on people's heads out in public places. I wish we saw more, but we don't. But lent does not belong to the world, it belongs to the Church, [and] always has.
"What does that mark mean to us? What does it mean to you? For me, it is a reminder of out mortality; that's what the Prayer Book says. It is a reminder of what we don't like about getting older and it also reminds us to give up being super human. In fact, you could consider that Lent is all about learning once again how to be ourselves and not God. That's the message of Good Friday and the season prepares us to meet the Cross and celebrate the Easter victory.
"But there's more. It is also a reminder that we are in a relationship.
"...we are reminded of [this new relationship] with a dry, dusty signing of ashes. 'Remember that dust you are, and to dust you shall return.'
"Yes, it says we all die and return to the earth. But what it doesn't say is that we are in God's hands, too. We are reminded of the possibilities and limitations on our being human. But we are also reminded of the grace conferred in our human status and stature. We are reminded that we are created of God to be human, something we forget by our constant striving to be more than human.
"I am profoundly moved by Ash Wednesday. I think it takes great courage to come forward to the rail to have ashes imposed on the forehead. I am deeply impressed by people's acknowledgment of mortality, and their honoring it also. Because's that's what we do. It is the single day in the church year when we come together to commonly say to ourselves, to one another, and to God, I am but dust and you are my God.
"If we can't say that, then we can't forgive one another, forgive ourselves, or allow God to forgive us.
"Former President Jimmy Carter tells this story. He had applied to enter a nuclear submarine program under Admiral Hyman Rickover, who then interviewed him for the position. At the end of the interview Rickover asked, 'How did you stand in your class at the Naval Academy?'
"Carter answered, 'Sir, I stood 59 in a class of 820,' waiting to be congratulated.
"Instead, Rickover asked in reply, 'Did you do your best?'
"Carter began to reply that he had, but then recalled that he could have learned more. 'No, sir, I didn't always do my best.'
"Rickover looked at Carter for a long time in silence and then asked finally - a question that Carter never forgot - nor was he able to answer - 'Why not?'
"So choose a discipline. Take something on like a good book to read or give up something. Choose a discipline that will remind you to be centered, not in YOU, but in God.
"Let our be our intention that this Lenten season is for our community a truly best time in which we grow more deeply in our faith, acknowledging our humanity. If that is not our intention, then 'Why not?'"
Peace,
Jack
"...It is Ash Wednesday, February 9. It is the day when you see some black smudges on people's heads out in public places. I wish we saw more, but we don't. But lent does not belong to the world, it belongs to the Church, [and] always has.
"What does that mark mean to us? What does it mean to you? For me, it is a reminder of out mortality; that's what the Prayer Book says. It is a reminder of what we don't like about getting older and it also reminds us to give up being super human. In fact, you could consider that Lent is all about learning once again how to be ourselves and not God. That's the message of Good Friday and the season prepares us to meet the Cross and celebrate the Easter victory.
"But there's more. It is also a reminder that we are in a relationship.
"...we are reminded of [this new relationship] with a dry, dusty signing of ashes. 'Remember that dust you are, and to dust you shall return.'
"Yes, it says we all die and return to the earth. But what it doesn't say is that we are in God's hands, too. We are reminded of the possibilities and limitations on our being human. But we are also reminded of the grace conferred in our human status and stature. We are reminded that we are created of God to be human, something we forget by our constant striving to be more than human.
"I am profoundly moved by Ash Wednesday. I think it takes great courage to come forward to the rail to have ashes imposed on the forehead. I am deeply impressed by people's acknowledgment of mortality, and their honoring it also. Because's that's what we do. It is the single day in the church year when we come together to commonly say to ourselves, to one another, and to God, I am but dust and you are my God.
"If we can't say that, then we can't forgive one another, forgive ourselves, or allow God to forgive us.
"Former President Jimmy Carter tells this story. He had applied to enter a nuclear submarine program under Admiral Hyman Rickover, who then interviewed him for the position. At the end of the interview Rickover asked, 'How did you stand in your class at the Naval Academy?'
"Carter answered, 'Sir, I stood 59 in a class of 820,' waiting to be congratulated.
"Instead, Rickover asked in reply, 'Did you do your best?'
"Carter began to reply that he had, but then recalled that he could have learned more. 'No, sir, I didn't always do my best.'
"Rickover looked at Carter for a long time in silence and then asked finally - a question that Carter never forgot - nor was he able to answer - 'Why not?'
"So choose a discipline. Take something on like a good book to read or give up something. Choose a discipline that will remind you to be centered, not in YOU, but in God.
"Let our be our intention that this Lenten season is for our community a truly best time in which we grow more deeply in our faith, acknowledging our humanity. If that is not our intention, then 'Why not?'"
Peace,
Jack
Size 10!
I just did an RDA check on Potassium and it appears I'm low. This appears on most food packages. Definitely need more. Might need a supplement. Tiredness is a symptom. Anyway, something else to look into when my birthday money comes and I can afford vitamins.
I'm wearing my size 10 jeans today, but they are tight. However, they sure looked good in the mirror at the gym today. :)
Forgot my protein drink. I left it on the second floor of the building where the mailboxes are. It was the powdered type that I'd added water to and put in a travel cup. I hope it's still there when I get home. Am I stupid or what? I had to buy a couple drinks from the gym to get my protein after my workout. I am totally dependant on protein drinks.
Did some quick shopping for a swimsuit at Ross. I looked at a cute black suit, but the neck was cut way too low and showed my breasts. I like more modest clothing. I finally settled on a black and pink size 12 Liz Claiborne suit. The neck is high and covers my chest completely. Both were one piece suits. I won't wear a bikini. If I can find a better suit, I'll buy it. I was checking out this, but don't know if the 50% off is still good:
http://www.wholesomewear.com/slimmer-c.html
My weight was up a little over a pound today to an even 162. I expected that, though. It'll continue climbing for a while.
I'm wearing my size 10 jeans today, but they are tight. However, they sure looked good in the mirror at the gym today. :)
Forgot my protein drink. I left it on the second floor of the building where the mailboxes are. It was the powdered type that I'd added water to and put in a travel cup. I hope it's still there when I get home. Am I stupid or what? I had to buy a couple drinks from the gym to get my protein after my workout. I am totally dependant on protein drinks.
Did some quick shopping for a swimsuit at Ross. I looked at a cute black suit, but the neck was cut way too low and showed my breasts. I like more modest clothing. I finally settled on a black and pink size 12 Liz Claiborne suit. The neck is high and covers my chest completely. Both were one piece suits. I won't wear a bikini. If I can find a better suit, I'll buy it. I was checking out this, but don't know if the 50% off is still good:
http://www.wholesomewear.com/slimmer-c.html
My weight was up a little over a pound today to an even 162. I expected that, though. It'll continue climbing for a while.
Wednesday, February 02, 2005
No longer obese!
My diet is coming along great. Dropped a pound today which put me one pound under my previous low. I'm 162 as of this morning. :) I feel great. My tummy hardly sticks out at all when I'm standing. One (overweight) lady at work commented on my flat tummy. :)
I've lost 46 pounds as of today. I still eat fairly low carb, but discovered that upping my carbs to 70-90g a day and having a piece of fruit gave me more stamina at the gym. I'm actually beginning to like fruit. Now that I've gotten rid of the refined carbs the fruit actually tastes sweet!
My weight bounces around a lot, but I'm okay with it. Over time the general trend is downward - in December I lost 3.25 pounds, and in January 3 pounds. I can live with that. Slow and steady wins the race. At that rate I'll be at goal in about 3 months. [Later note: Goal back then was 155. My current goal is 140.]
Thank you Dr. Atkins! I have my life back. :)
I've lost 46 pounds as of today. I still eat fairly low carb, but discovered that upping my carbs to 70-90g a day and having a piece of fruit gave me more stamina at the gym. I'm actually beginning to like fruit. Now that I've gotten rid of the refined carbs the fruit actually tastes sweet!
My weight bounces around a lot, but I'm okay with it. Over time the general trend is downward - in December I lost 3.25 pounds, and in January 3 pounds. I can live with that. Slow and steady wins the race. At that rate I'll be at goal in about 3 months. [Later note: Goal back then was 155. My current goal is 140.]
Thank you Dr. Atkins! I have my life back. :)
Tuesday, February 01, 2005
Nearing a size 10!
Well, the size 12s are getting loose, so I tried on the size 10s I bought last week (bought them as motivation). I had to suck my tummy in a little, but really, they fit quite well as long as I was standing. I'm sure they would asphixiate (sp) me if I sat down, so I changed back into my size 12s and put on a belt. The belt is on the last notch! I think when I started this diet I was either on the first or second notch!
The 10s were stretch 10s so they are tight through the hip and thigh, then flare out from the knee into the boot cut. They look real sexy. My stretch 12s are getting loose in the thigh and have lost the sexy look.
D*mn! I can't believe I'm almost a size 10! I can't believe I've lost 45 pounds! :o) My entire adult life I think a 12 was the smallest I ever was, and I just gained from there, being a 14 most of the time. So a 10 is a total accomplishment!
The 10s were stretch 10s so they are tight through the hip and thigh, then flare out from the knee into the boot cut. They look real sexy. My stretch 12s are getting loose in the thigh and have lost the sexy look.
D*mn! I can't believe I'm almost a size 10! I can't believe I've lost 45 pounds! :o) My entire adult life I think a 12 was the smallest I ever was, and I just gained from there, being a 14 most of the time. So a 10 is a total accomplishment!
Imbolc...*sigh*
I was writing the daily report, and when I typed the date in, it suddenly hit me what today is - Imbolc, also known as Brigid, one of the 8 major festivals of the Wiccan calendar. It's nice that it took me until past 6 pm to remember, but I much prefer it when I forget them completely until some other day.
The only significance this sabbat holds for me is that beyond dedicating myself to all the gods at my initiation, I bound myself specifically to Brigid. I even had a little altar on my wall just to her, and at one time had a Brigid's cross necklace made of pewter. She really was my favorite.
In my studies on the goddess Brigid, I also read stories about the saint - some true and some not true. Some of the myths surrounding the saint are pretty cool, and the real person was quite the innovator in her day. She remains second in popularity to St. Patrick in Ireland.
The only significance this sabbat holds for me is that beyond dedicating myself to all the gods at my initiation, I bound myself specifically to Brigid. I even had a little altar on my wall just to her, and at one time had a Brigid's cross necklace made of pewter. She really was my favorite.
In my studies on the goddess Brigid, I also read stories about the saint - some true and some not true. Some of the myths surrounding the saint are pretty cool, and the real person was quite the innovator in her day. She remains second in popularity to St. Patrick in Ireland.
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