Beltane

Breathe, Victoria, breathe. It will soon be over.

Okay, here it is Sabbath afternoon, April 30th, and I sit down to plan out tomorrow's menu so I can stay within my alloted calories and carbs. I click the April 30th link to go forrward and think, "What day's tomorrow? Is there an April 31st, or is it May 1st?" It only takes a moment before I think, "It's May 1st. Ack! Beltane! May 1st!"

Ok, what else is tomorrow? What else can I think about? Well, it's Easter Sunday for the Orthodox Church. It's the end of Passover for the Jews.

But I'm thinking about the Morris Dancers that will be in the park tomorrow to dance the sun up. I think about how I won't be there. And my heart is filled with sadness. I have not been in 9 years, and my heart still longs for that.

Pray for me. It will soon be over. And then my spiritual birthday is May 3. I just want to survive it without having to resort to my Xanex, althought that is what it's there for.

Besides Halloween, this is the hardest time of the year for me.