This is long, and written more for myself than others. Feel free to skip this post. There may be more religious posts coming as God works with me to walk closer with Him.
Church is not about food; it is about worship. It's not about me; it's about God. I spend the whole service thinking about the snacks afterward when I should be living in the moment and worshipping God. There is a time for everything, and I have been mixing those up and letting them bleed into one another.
Joshua 24:19 - God is a jealous God. He must be first in our lives. I wonder, have I let my interest in diet and fitness become my God? There is nothing wrong with these interests unless they take the place of God in my life. Have I let this happen?
One night during worship at Conference I remembered the ring I wear on my wedding finger. It is a commitment I made to God, in His sight, to follow Him and be "married" to him. Where has that commitment gone?
While praying one night at Conference I told God that I have lost my first love! I was reminded of the messages to the seven churches in Revelation. One was told they had left their first love. I got up and got my Bible, found the passage and read it. In it were simple instructions - remember from where you have fallen, repent, and do the things you did at first.
My focus at Conference was on how fat and thin people were - I thought about it a lot, and there were a LOT of overweight and obese Baptists there. I don't believe we are any more fat than the rest of the U.S. We are just a microcosm of the country. But whatever happened to being in the world but not of it? We eat like the world, so we are overweight like the world.
You don't see this as much in the Adventist church. They eat a healthier diet. I don't believe they live longer because they are vegetarian; they live longer simply because they stay away from those high-carb (all refined), high-fat (lots of trans-fat) foods that are killing the rest of America. Don't Baptist owe themselves and God the same courtesy? The theme of Thursday's conference was the Holy Spirit. One speaker mentioned that we are temples of the Spirit. Shouldn't we be taking care of our temples better than we have?
Anyway, fat and thin and diet and such was my focus at Conference and that isn't right.
And then I come home to the computer and satellite TV being broken. There's a couple layers to this, too.
1) Last time I got money from my Dad and the property in Oregon God reminded me to tithe on it. I didn't. I've forgotten to tithe before, but this time God actually reminded me and I still didn't. It seems every time I don't tithe when I should, something bad happens to me dealing with money. One time my purse was snatched, and now I have a computer problem that is going to cost a lot of money to fix. It would have been easier just to tithe the $40 to start with because the computer repair will cost much more than that.
2) The computer and satellite TV are my two main distractions at home. I think God got rid of both of them so I can spend more time with Him. He wants me, He wants my devotion, He wants me to talk to Him, for He knows that my highest joy is in Him. Nothing on earth can fill that void.
I'm holding on to that "rope of hope" given to me at Sabbath School. Right now my only hope is in God. He hurts, but also promises to heal. All I can do is wait quietly for my healing.
It was a great help to me to study Lamentations in Sabbath School the day before all hell broke loose. Quoting from Andrew Samuel's comments on Lamentations (Helping Hand quarterly):
(Jeremiah) was somehow able to recognize that everything that was happening...was part of God's plan to discipline his people...He was acknowledging that since God allowed them to be suffering as they were, he was also the ticket to their redemption.
It takes good times and bad to make a mature person...Our Christian walk does not exempt us from the realities of life. It is a sobering thought to realize that just about every human experience that the non-Christian has, it is also possible for the Christian to have...Every tragedy that can befall an ungodly person, can also befall the godly individual. Christians can suffer from depression, mental illness, anxiety attacks, as well as psychological and emotional trauma.
Maybe your walls are falling in and the inner sanctuary of your life is being looted and burned...Maybe you feel like God is mad at you.
You can choose to stay in your pain and believe that you can't help how you're feeling. You can cave into the lies of the enemy and park in that place of desolation and ruin. You can focus on the problems and allow your outward affliction and your inner turmoil to so consume you you you fall apart.
It is okay to be honest with God. It is okay to express your true feelings to the Almighty like Jeremiah did. But, it is not okay to stay there.
Sometimes we become so self-focused that we have forgotten what God says about the valleys of life and that others have been there before and been victorious...We must engage our will. We must force ourselves to remember truth...Push God's faithfulness to the forefront of your mind, even when you don't feel like doing it.
The Father's correcting of his son is not a disinheriting of him. Whatever sorrow we are in, his hand is in it, and therefore we may be assured, it is but for a season.
Let's focus on God's love, mercy, and faithfulness. He does not promise to prevent problems from coming into our lives, but he does promise to go through them with us.
We can count on God's faithfulness when we mess up. Would you be ashamed for others to know everything you've said, done, or thought in the last seven days?...I know how much I've messed up and stand in desperate need of God's mercy.
Losing my first love is an issue God tried to get me to deal with a year ago. I didn't, and the problem has only gotten bigger in that time. So this year I am being forced to deal with it through the loss of my "toys." I feel like I'm grounded - "No computer or TV for you, young lady!" And the financial burden of the broken computer is weighing heavily on me, too. I simply don't have that kind of money. :( God, will you help me with this bill and the others that will be neglected because of this?
The title of this blog used to be "Stumbling To Bethlehem." This can still be seen in the URL (stumblingtobethlehem.blogspot.com). That is me. Stumbling, barely staying upright, trying to get the a baby in a manger in Bethlehem.
As I got ready to post this entry, two things happened. First, my Direct TV receiver came and I got it set up and activated, so I now have TV again! Yay!
Second, my devotional reading the morning was very timely. It was all about how God comforts us in trouble and will someday make all things right.
August 8, 2007
The Sound Of Sirens
READ: Revelation 21:1-5
He who sat on the throne said, "Behold, I make all things new." —Revelation 21:5
I was enjoying my son’s high school soccer game when the relative calm and normalcy of that warm September afternoon was shattered by a sound both distinctive and alarming—the sound of sirens. The shrill whine seemed out of place at such a pleasant moment, and it demanded my attention. According to singer Don Henley, a siren usually means that "somebody’s going to emergency" or "somebody’s going to jail." He’s right. In either case, someone’s day, perhaps including the law enforcement or rescue personnel, just took a turn for the worse.
As I lost my attention on the game and thought about the siren fading into the distance, it occurred to me that sirens are a reminder of a powerful reality: Our world is sadly broken. Whether the siren tells us of criminal activity or personal tragedy, it reminds us that something is desperately wrong and needs to be made right.
At such times, it helps to remember that God sees our world in its brokenness and has pledged that one day He will wipe away the old and "make all things new" (Rev. 21:5). That promise encourages us in the hardships of life, and it provides the whisper of His comfort—a whisper that can drown out even the sound of sirens. —Bill Crowder
He is coming! "Star of Morning,"
All the faithful caught away,
When the trumpet, in a moment,
Ushers in the glad new day. —Dimmock
God’s whisper of comfort quiets the noise of our trials.
-From Our Daily Bread for August 8.
My computer may or may not be fixable. Brad told me that I could buy a MacBook on credit. I looked at it and it looks like I could get what I need for about $50 a month. I tried to apply for the credit today, but it said there was a problem so I have to wait and check back later.
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